Every time I see water of any sort (we were all at the ocean and the waves were really big), I think to myself, "Ollie drowned, really he did? how awful, my heart hurts for his suffering and my suffering" I get nervous and anxious about others playing in the water. I couldn't imagine seeing another person drowned in water. The trauma is too much....I know this will always be a small fear of mine, but I think I am doing pretty well to even play in it with Pops.
I missed Ollie so much. Chris and I just couldn't believe he wasn't with us. The whole family missed him. We cried. He has been gone for over a year. We miss his little face, hands, smile, giggle, hair, lips, and toes...Oh my momma heart hurts. He would have been the perfect age for disneyland. Our friends that have a son just a few months younger than Ollie were there, it broke my heart to see there son and think how much Ollie would have enjoyed every minute. I wonder what words he would be saying? how tall he would be? I can see him giggling now. It warms my heart. He would love his sister so much. I am so thankful Ollie was in my life for 2 short, but oh so precious years. My life changed for the better the day I became a mom. I now know the deep love my mother has for me. Everlasting and undying.
Why are we hear on this earth?
What is it all about?
I wont even attempt to figure it out, but I do think about it often.
People live and people die, we know this from the moment we arrive on the earth. But we are suppose to die when we are older....darn Ollies short life.
Everyday I try to be grateful for all of my blessings. I dont have my son here, but I do have so much. I am so so blessed.I don't think anyone is in our life by coincidence, the person at the grocery store or the person at the bank...
BE KIND, FOR EVERYONE YOU MEET IS FIGHTING A HARD BATTLE.
|Standing on her own at Disneyland! My mom made her cute outfits.|
|Pops couldnt decide on just one stuffed animal from grams.|
|The new cars ride..zoom zoom|
|The crew at the ocean|
|I love Minnie mouse, I always have ever since I was a little gal. My soon to be sister Jessie (i hope), my sister Sami and my mom Sheri.|
|We wore our Ollie shirts, everyone looked at them, a few people commented.|
|Sweet shot mom.|
|Next to Newport Beach|
|The guys loved playing in the waves!|
|The water was so cold, she didnt really like it.|