Wednesday, June 5, 2013

my life today

this is what my life feels like today, a big unorganized mess of "stuff"
i'm not ashamed to be real and show the world that I can't keep up. im not perfect.
i'm not a perfect house cleaner, wife or mother, but i am trying and today my efforts are non existent. as you can see from the pictures.  its just so hard having one son who isnt here but all his stuff is...weird. my mind doesnt like to accept that he isnt here, because our family is still getting tender mercies that ollie is real and aware of us here on earth... AMAZING!

every drawer, closet and bin are popping open with clothes. 

Jam-packed drawers.
Ollie has the top 2 drawers and Poppy has the bottom 3. I am slowly removing Ollies clothes, but man its hard. Its so permanent that hes gone from our earthly life. 
Little by little replacing his stuff with Poppys. sad.

A mix of Ollie and Poppys shoes...not enough space for everything. Poppy's room is now a big mix of his and hers... Its a mess. (I guess this means I should give stuff away)
These are Ollies clothes I took out of the drawer. I don't have anywhere to store them, so they will just sit there until I build up enough energy to figure it out.....part of me likes seeing them, imagining as if they were just washed and waiting to be folded. As if Ollie got them dirty from the dirt and mud in our big backyard while playing with Poppy. together as it should have been...I so wish.