Saturday, December 7, 2013

Loxxley Koa Kai Hebb

We finally decided on a name for this little guy!
(we wanted the perfect name for him,  that's why we took so long, not because we thought he wasn't going to survive)

2 Weeks Old
•He is tolerating 12ml of breast milk, fed through his feeding tube.
•He gained a little weight, 2.67lbs. 
•He is pooping.
•He is on room air most of the time.
•He loved skin to skin cuddling with his momma.
•He still hates being bothered and loves being wrapped like a burrito.
•His brain scan came back negative for a possible brain bleed.

I go to the hospital everyday and deliver my milk, it's a full time job, but so worth it. I got to hold the little man today for almost 2 hours! It's so wonderful to feel his heart beating 
against mine, he loves it a doesn't even move! 

We sure love our little miracle! 

Holding my little Loxxley hooked up to all those wires, makes me think of little Ollie when he was also fighting for his life at the exact same hospital.....such raw emotions to accept.
**I wonder if I will ever be as happy as I was in this picture, watched Ollies life celebration video last night....sobbed and sobbed**

How can my son, Ollie Kai Hebb not be here???
Why is he not here?
How did he leave?
Where is he?
-Not fair-

Thank you my angels on earth for all your continued love and prayers. 
In the last 19 months, I have had one child transition to heaven, a month later had a beautiful daughter, and then  had a child born too early....It's just too much for me to fully grasp. 
I am still holding on. 
I will continue to fight along with Loxxley.

I cannot thank you all enough for your kind comments and love through out this last year and a half. I wouldn't have made it this far with out so many of you, whom many of you I now call my most cherished friends. I hope I can one day pay all the love forward to others who are in need.

With all my broken hearted love,
Tiffany Hebb-Ollie, Poppy and Loxxley's momma!