Nothing makes it better

Nothing will make death of your child in this life better. 

Nothing. 

Really. 

Yes there are things that lessen the pain like having more children and having faith and hope in seeing them again, going on beautiful adventures, watching the sunset. 

But seriously.

Nothing makes it better. 

All these things are wonderful but when a piece of your heart is gone--you long for something more--your precious precious child. 

I still get those panic attacks deep inside my chest that won't release themselves. They take my breath away and I feel like I'm suffocating. They are heavy and crippling. It's very hard to breathe. It's like nothing else I have EVER experienced. 

Sometimes I just sit and stare off and wonder how my life got this way? I never imagined in all of my life a person could feel such pain. Such loss. Such despair. Such longing. Wow. It's overly INTENSE  to say the least. 

It makes me think, we need to have more compassion for what someone is going through in this life. What trials they face and smile through. We do not know someone's pain unless we have traveled that road. Jesus Christ is the only human/God to have done this--the only one who has physically lifted my pain from my chest. 

Let's be more loving. 

More compassionate and accepting. 

Judge not that ye be not judged. I tell my self this 100 times a day. 

**and holidays or any kind of family gathering alway make me miss my boy more...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING. 

Thanksgiving is not a one day holiday, it is a lifestyle for happy people!!!